Stop! Collaborate, and listen!

Buckle up, you’re in for a wild ride with this awesome collaboration between Jamie and myself. I started a blog, and Jamie was so supportive of me. She’s a natural born writer and used to write for the Pensacola News Journal. She is married with two awesome little munchkins that are as cute as can be. So, she quickly said to me, “We should collaborate and write something together.” What better to write about than something we both work hard at each and every single day of our lives. Emotional Stability. Jamie’s words will appear italicized & bold and mine will be just normal without any features that way you know whose thoughts are whose. I was going to put hers in one color and mine in another, but apparently I don’t know how to do that.

Emotional Stability

Emotional stability is elusive for some. Ok, so first of all I looked up the word elusive. Elusive means difficult to find, catch, or believe for those of you who needed a definition. Emotional stability is so hard to understand. First you have to know what emotional stability looks like, and I used to have no idea. Emotional stability is the capacity to maintain ones emotional balance under stressful circumstances. For others – and this is unfair – it seems to come easily. It is so annoying how unfair it is if you are naturally good at maintaining a healthy emotional stability. Apparently there is a common phrase, “The key to success is emotional stability.” So for those of you who are naturally emotionally stable, I am happy for you. You have the key to success. There was another thing I read that said, “Emotional stability refers to the extent at which a person is calm and secure. A person who is very stable emotionally would remain calm in many situations, and would feel secure.” I like that. It sounds hopeful and I would like to remain calm in any and all situations.

I’m in the middle. But for a long time, stability was elusive for me, too. Stability isn’t even something that I used to think about until I started looking at myself with complete honesty.

I’m an alcoholic. I’ve also been diagnosed with major depressive and bipolar disorders. Nothing about these facts add up to emotional stability. In fact, I could remain justifiably unstable. But I don’t. Today, I am emotionally stable. Except when I’m not, which is not very often these days. Through a lot of hard work – therapy, working a 12-step program, etc. – I’ve discovered a higher power. And that higher power exists within.

I know how this sounds. You can stop reading now if you like. But spirituality, having faith in something bigger than yourself, is actually immensely practical.

I agree. Having faith in something that isn’t tangible sounds insane doesn’t it? But people like to complicate it. Some people think that God is the only option. Some think it’s Allah, or Buddha. Some like to think of a higher power as love, and connection. Others may believe in forces, energy, nature. Here’s the kicker, it honestly doesn’t matter what you call it. I used to call my higher power sky daddy, but then I was like “why does it have to be a man?” Probably cause society taught us that men are the dominate ones. But that is besides the point and a whole other blog post. The point is that you just have faith. You can’t see electricity and you have faith that it is always going to work, don’t you?

A higher power aids me in living a more emotionally stable life. The reasons why are as follows:
1. I don’t – as much – look to the outside world for validation. My validation comes from within.
2. I don’t feel alone.
3. I feel connected.
4. I feel grounded.
5. I am a part of something much larger than myself.

SAME. PERIOD.

How one goes about finding a higher power would be a whole other blog, so I’m not going to get much into that here. But if you’re interested in emotional stability, start seeking your own spirituality. Find the voice within that’s full of love. The search can be long and it can go deep, but in the end, is emotional freedom. MIC DROP.

I am just starting to feel the freedom today. All it takes is open-mindedness and a little bit of willingness. Just surrender. I did. Jamie did. We surrender all the time. You can also surrender. You can also build faith and trust in something that is greater than you. But you don’t have to if you don’t want to.

Today I’m spiritual and stable.